Saturday, August 21, 2010

Things I think about when the kids are asleep

Henry.

Jack.

When I'm not a mom, for a few hours each night I think about non-mom things. I think about how much I love fall how it is the one season I could easily enjoy year round. You see fall, in the mid-Atlantic, is beautifully unpredictable. Tank top and jeans one day, sweater and hat the next. I think I care a lot less about how I look in the summer time, because it's so hot and humid that I think to myself "what's the point?!" Fall is right around the corner and that means alt. rock blasting with the windows down... okay, the windows a little down... there are small children in the car. Using a blowdryer. Putting on make up. Maryland Renaissance Festival. Love. And there's the ever exciting hiking and walking when the leaves are changing.

Lately, I am thinking about houses. For the area that we're looking in our price range all the houses need work. We're pretty handy, so this is not a turn off. Some need a kitchen remodel, some need a kitchen because right now they don't have one; but they all need work. We're finding that we're choosing between a ideal location in a cute neighborhood with great paths and playgrounds but with no real land or sweet piece of ass land but kinda isolated, no potential for neighbor-friends and the house has no 'wow'.

Finally, I think about my identity or what's left of my identity as it's becoming overgrown by motherhood. I love being a mom, I think I'm pretty good at it (except when I think I'm shit at it) but I don' t ever want to be the type of mom who is utterly defined by the 'mommy' status. I used to do yoga twice a week, which I absolutely love, but it's really hard to find the time with 2 little guys. I love to paint but my current house doesn't have any more walls to spare for me to hang my art so I either need to start giving it away... or better yet selling it. I really should do that, the stager that came through our house commented on my paintings and asked who did them because one she was thinking another client would like and I said "Me" and she said "Would you ever sell me some?" ... "Yeah." ... "Lemme get your number."

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